While I'm obviously upset on a Damon/Elena level because it feels like this whole season was utterly pointless with regards to the growth of their relationship, it's not what happened with them that has destroyed my stanning of this show. Nope, it's three very specific character-related things --
1. Elena. No growth. All regression. The Elena we saw tonight in her words and actions is the exact same Elena we saw all throughout season 02. All of the growth, all of it completely undermined and ignored. The fact that even Elena as a vampire is going to be with Stefan a while come season 04 shows that clearly. (Per Julie Plec's interview with Entertainment Weekly.)
2. Stefan. No consequences. The cruel way that he killed Andie will go completely unpunished. The fact that he chose an innocent woman -- who'd already been used/abused by his brother -- and in an extremely cruel manner chose to kill her just to teach his brother a lesson ... which he then COMPLETELY undermined an hour or so later is absolutely heinous. And he has suffered zero consequences for that. Zero consequences for using Elena and her horror over the night her parents died to get his revenge on Klaus. The fact that he selfishly chose to turn off his switch because it hurt, never mind that he was hurting others and acted like a cruel, uncaring asshole ... again, zero consequences. All of Stefan's stalking of Elena, lie upon lie upon lie, semi-abusive behavior, all of it pre-and-post season 03 ... all of it has zero consequences.
3. Damon. When Elena -- the girl he loved, the girl who knew that he loved her, the girl that he had spent the last six months protecting, saving, being there for, comforting, being used as an outlet for her sexual frustration to a degree towards the end there, the girl who used him as a replacement for his brother until said brother was ready to decide that he wanted to get back together with Elena -- KNEW that Damon was almost certainly going to die, and yet she chose at that moment to tell him that she loved his brother, and that it would always be his brother. After everything that Damon has been through, after how many times he's been rejected, how many times he'd been left in the dust, she chose to (a) let him die alone, (b) knowing that once again he wasn't loved, he wasn't chosen.
And THAT is why I'm pissed off and bitter. Sure, I still think that Damon/Elena are endgame. And sure, they layered all of these little things that show such. However, how they wrote Elena with no growth, Stefan with no consequences, and Damon, left all alone and unloved, it made a mockery of everything I stupidly believed they were writing. There was no deep writing, no awareness in what a manipulative douchebag Stefan has been, no layers, no awareness that there is zero growth for Elena and that she's as bad as Bella in her own way. Sure, Damon/Elena are endgame most likely, but they've done a damn good job in essentially wrecking two of the three main characters for me, and the third was -- once again -- left out to dry.
Yes, I'm upset from a couple-girl point of view that we had two full seasons of Stefan/Elena, a season of what I thought was building to Damon/Elena, but was in actuality just a way to twist the knife into Damon's gut yet again and show him that it will always be Stefan. Plus, it was set-up for more Damon is alone on the outside watching Stefan/Elena -- who now have eternity together -- be a couple once more in yet ANOTHER season. But, really, the main frustration comes from what they did and did not do with these characters, and how wrongly it played out in my opinion.
And that is why I'm done stanning. I kept defending the show when we didn't get fall-out, we didn't get reactions, so sure that they were coming and it was all going to be awesome. And we got NOTHING. No discussion/exploration of what happened on Damon's deathbed. No discussion/exploration of all of the awful things Stefan did. No fallout at all about what happened with Damon and Elena in Denver. Nothing. How great I thought the writing was, the characterization, the stanning and the defending, the surety and belief that it was all heading somewhere glorious was all revealed to be a joke.
Don't get me wrong, I'll still watch for Damon, for Damon/Elena scenes, other things I still like about the show, but thinking it's offering more than what we see on the screen? I'm done. Giving them the benefit of the doubt? Nope. The great, layered writing I've so lauded and defended? Doesn't exist. It's just another ridiculous teen drama on the CW that has the benefit of some fantastic actors, and pulpy, exciting writing that when examined doesn't hold up.