Arabian (arabian) wrote,

My mini-review of 'The Deep Below'

This won't be long because there's not much to say. I will say before the cut that throughout the movie I could not help but comment on how frickin' GOOD Jason looked ... because he looked really, really good. Super-pretty. Super-hot. Super-handsome. GO-OOD! Yummy!

I honestly don't know which was worse: (A) The script (B) The direction or (C) the music. The music was really, really, REALLY bad. REALLY BAD!!!! The script was weak and sparse, but not in a poetically spare way, but rather a 'we had no idea what dialogue to put here so we figured we'd include lots of shots of nothing happening and hope we get a good director who can make them interesting.' Alas, the director was unable to elevate the crapfest that was script in any way, shape or form. It was stagnant and meandering and just LA-AME!!! So, so, so bad. Hmm, can I just say that all three sucked and leave it at that? The sad thing is that the plot in and of itself was actually a good one; it was just that the script/direction and overall execution of it bit the big one. Some of the acting was okay, but geez, Michael Dorn, did all that Star Trek make-up take away any acting skill you once had or would you THAT bored?

The good? Jason. Very pretty. His acting? It was okay. Really not the best highlight of his talent, and I'd highly recommend never showing this to someone if you're trying to convince them just how talented an actor he is. Jason was seriously hindered by the GOD-AWFUL script and GOD-AWFUL direction, which put him at an okay level with some moments where his natural talent shone through despite the dialogue he was spouting and dead direction "guiding" him. Oh and he was pretty.

Ooh, ooh and in one of the scenes with the love interest, there was skipping!! And hopping!! It was wonderful!!! (And pretty.) Oh, and yeah, good kisser. He gives good screen kiss. I officially blame every crappy kiss of Logan and Veronica at Kristen Bell's door ... because he gives good screen kiss (the only crappy kisses I've seen him participate in were with Bell, so yeah, blaming her. It's ALL her!). My favorite part was when he wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her closer, it was just so suave and sexy and romantic. Yeah, gives good screen kiss. Also ... uhm, he spends about a quarter of the film shirtless, and another quarter to a half in a wetsuit. He dives a lot. Yay!! He also plays guitar at one point. Yes, guitar. DAMN YOU, ROB for semi-ruining what would have been an awesome fangirl-squeeing moment. Ah well. You know someone somewhere will do contrast shots and Jason so FTW it's not even funny. He looked so pretty in his bare feet strumming the chords.

Overall? Bad, bad, bad movie. It's no Black Cadillac -- which I really did think was pretty good. But Jason? Sure done brought the pretty.

I posted this in response to leucocrystal's capspam about this (check it out), where she talked about Jason's unconventional looks and yet why he was still so attractive to many and it got me thinking about something that's been ruminating in my brain for awhile, so I thought I'd add my response here since part of it did derive from watching him in this film.

After I watched a whole slew of Logan/Veronica music vids recently, I put a post up about how Jason is fucking gorgeous. I just finished this movie and then looked through leucocrystal's caps and Jason. Dohring. is. Fucking. Gorgeous. I don't agree that he's not conventionally attractive, because there are so many kinds of conventionally attractive. Edward Norton is not conventionally attractive. Generally, you're not going to look at a picture of him, see him on screen and think 'he's attractive.' It's what he brings to the table with his talent and charisma that makes him attractive. Take away the talent and charisma and just look at Jason on screen for a bit, or a good shot of him and the guy is good-looking. He is. He has these big, beautifully expressive, rich brown eyes, nice shape, nice sheen to them. He has a gorgeous nose. Good cheekbones, hair that looks good on him. Nice lips, a nice smile. Altogether it comes out pretty damn well. I think we're just sooooooooooooo conditioned at this point to think he's not because we heard nonstop that Teddy Dunn was the pretty boy and Jason wasn't, but that's okay. No, Jason's not a pretty boy. But he's a damn good-looking guy. Fucking gorgeous, in fact.
Tags: deep below, jason dohring, movies, reviews

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